Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Mamahood:Through the Looking Glass

For me, the early days of motherhood felt a lot like I was little Alice Lindell waking up in a magical world full of oddities, games of logic, and self-discovery. Well, first it was like the falling through the tunnel with little end in sight. The newborn phase was overwhelming because it was the most uncharted and elusive aspect of motherhood. There was no way to really judge what was to come. However, the hardest part was looking at myself in the mirror. So much of the experience has been about rediscovering who I am now that I am 1+1, but also adapting to myself as a mother who is still the Jenn I was before-- which means the person with the same idiosyncrasies and issues.

I ask this question of myself and Addison all of the time.
Now, I have often used this quote as my own mantra in life, but it is the most fitting MOMtra I can think of: "It is very simple," she thought. "You get up, you go, you do, you see, you put one foot in front of the other and along the way you do your very best to enjoy it." (I have always attributed this to Carroll's text but I believe I have been misled--If anyone knows where this is originally from PLEASE let me know.)

This quote exemplifies how I live in the day-to-day, even when my best seems less than the standard I set for myself. If it's what I've got in that twenty-four hours, I eke it out. Robotic? Sometimes. 

Really this is just to say that no matter what happens in life, every day is a new start and needs to be lived the best way you can--for the moment. For each new start, I, like Alice, come equipped with my manners, my smile, and the curious nature that translates into the never-ending quest to learn and improve. 

While perusing lines from "...Through the Looking Glass" I found the MOST fitting for the way I felt after the initial hormones and exhaustion of new mamahood wore off and I looked inside a bit:

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